Islam and Women: Modern Empowerment

The first article for my Woman's Column in the INFW Newsletter.

We’re living in a time where feminism is gaining interest in the world, especially in the west. Society has managed to ignite the ultimate enmity between the opposite genders, a man and a woman. Historically, society has tainted the minds of many women, inviting them to believe that men are unjust, hypocrites, and suppressers. It suggests that the only way a woman attains independence is by rebelling against her father, being arrogant with her brother, and disobeying her husband. If she doesn't, then she'll be put down as an underprivileged daughter, a humiliated mother, an abused wife, and an oppressed sister. Society has distorted all facts and fabricated all truths. It has taught one to rid herself of her religion because piety and honor are chains on freedom, hijab is limiting and a return to the Stone Age, prayer and fasting are a waste of time, and obedience to any man is slavery. But in the process of brainwashing, society has also managed to rid one of the happiness and comfort of generous parents, a happy marriage, and good brotherly relations.

Dear sisters,
You are half of humanity. You are half of this Ummah. Your ancestors, the remarkable women of Islam, were one of the main reasons that this great nation is still thriving today. You also have the chance to contribute to its greatness. Sisters, do not fool yourself into thinking that men are the ones who rule the world and you are only here to be stepped on. Just because women are not in the spotlight doesn’t mean they don’t exist. They share the responsibilities of enjoining the truth, forbidding the evil, and raising the flag of Islam with men, as it says in the Qur’an:

“The believers, men and women, are Awliya’ (supporters) of one another; they enjoin Al-Ma’ruf (Islamic belief) and forbid Al-Munkar (disbelief); they perform Salah and give Zakah, and obey Allah and his Messenger. Allah will have His Mercy on them. Surely Allah is All-Mighty, All-Wise.”

Women may share the common responsibilities with men, but the tremendous burden placed upon her is unlike any of the difficulties that men bear. That is why so much importance is given to mothers in Islam. They are the initial teachers in building a righteous society, providing that she adheres to the Qur’an and Sunnah. Sisters, you are raising the future leaders of this world and supporting the current ones. Your task isn’t easy, but it is indeed an honorable one. So many great scholars never would have existed if they hadn’t been encouraged to study Islam by their mothers. So many great leaders never would have stepped up if they hadn’t been encouraged by their wives.

Look at Khadija radi Allahu ‘anha, one of the most exemplary mothers and wives in the history of mankind. She was one of the very first people to believe in the Prophet Muhammad salallahu ‘alaihi wa sallam. She stood behind him every step of the way, continually comforting him, advising him, and putting him at ease. She brought tranquility and serenity to his soul. Not only that, but she raised their children to be strong and adherent Muslims. She may never have been the one whom everyone saw, but she contributed greatly to this Deen through her support of the Prophet salallahu ‘alaihi wa sallam.

Sisters, this is where your happiness lies: in being an obedient and believing daughter, a loyal and generous wife, and a pious and merciful mother. Do not think that you will become happy and free in imitating a man by taking off your hijab and giving up your family for materialism. I am not saying that you should set aside your academic and work related goals, but you need to know your limitations. Do not forget that your main duty is to Allah. Your role in building society is essential, and if you throw it away for some worldly success, you’re sacrificing the well-being of this Ummah as a whole. For every man in society, there is an even stronger woman behind him. If the man is the head, then the woman is the neck. The neck may not be noticeable, but it is what controls the movement of the head. Not only that, but it must be firm and stable if it’s going to support the head. Remember, you are mothers, wives, daughters, sisters, aunts, granddaughters, and grandmothers. You make this Ummah a nation.

إِنَّمَا ٱلتَّوۡبَةُ عَلَى ٱللَّهِ لِلَّذِينَ يَعۡمَلُونَ ٱلسُّوٓءَ بِجَهَـٰلَةٍ۬ ثُمَّ يَتُوبُونَ مِن قَرِيبٍ۬ فَأُوْلَـٰٓٮِٕكَ يَتُوبُ ٱللَّهُ عَلَيۡہِمۡ‌ۗ وَكَانَ ٱللَّهُ عَلِيمًا حَڪِيمً۬ا (١٧) وَلَيۡسَتِ ٱلتَّوۡبَةُ لِلَّذِينَ يَعۡمَلُونَ ٱلسَّيِّـَٔاتِ حَتَّىٰٓ إِذَا حَضَرَ أَحَدَهُمُ ٱلۡمَوۡتُ قَالَ إِنِّى تُبۡتُ ٱلۡـَٔـٰنَ وَلَا ٱلَّذِينَ يَمُوتُونَ وَهُمۡ ڪُفَّارٌ‌ۚ أُوْلَـٰٓٮِٕكَ أَعۡتَدۡنَا لَهُمۡ عَذَابًا أَلِيمً۬ا

"Allah accepts only the repentance of those who do evil in ignorance and foolishness and repent soon afterwards; it is they whom Allah forgive and Allah is Ever All-Knower, All-Wise. And of no effect is the repentence of those who continue to do evil deeds until the death faces one of them and he says: 'Now I repent,' nor of those who die while they are disbelievers. For them We have prepared a painful torment." [4:17-18]

A Bucket of a List

I'm a slacker. My friend's a slacker. We're both slackers and we're proud. We've never given in to the pressure of school, teachers, exams, projects, or the hopeless overachievers around us. We just go about, living our lives nonchalantly without giving those things a second thought. What I love most about our ability to not care about school is that we now appreciate more things in life. There's more out there than just getting good grades and sucking up to teachers, which is what the two of us do anyway. My friend, Miss Nickel the Juicer, took it upon herself to make a semi-bucket list, which I now call 'Nena and Nina's Infinite Playlist.' Although I have my whole life planned out, I never thought about making a bucket list. Making a bucket list is the first item to go on my bucket list. I'm just anticipating the feeling of what it would be like on my 80th birthday to look at my list and be able to cross out all of the crazy things I did in my life. It's quite exciting if you think about it. Since I don't have my list done yet, here are Nickel's top 10:

#10: go to a concert
#9: shave my head
#8: take a bite of an apple in the big apple
#7: get arrested (not for anything bad of course), spend a night in jail
#6: fall in love
#5: actually really help someone
#4: swim in the ocean with fancy clothes on
#3: GO TO VEGAS AND NOT CARE ABOUT ANYTHING
#2: travel. see the world. the good and the bad…but more good
#1: do yoga in the middle of a street

So far, my items are slightly less risque. I want to go skydiving, adopt an orphan, go to third-world country and just help out, live somewhere in the Middle East, memorize the Qur'an, go to China, learn yoga, eat sushi, and a bunch of other things that might take some thinking over.

Words That Don’t Exist in the English Language

L’esprit de escalier: (French) The feeling you get after leaving a conversation, when you think of all the things you should have said. Translated it means “the spirit of the staircase.”

Waldeinsamkeit: (German) The feeling of being alone in the woods.

Meraki: (Greek) Doing something with soul, creativity, or love.

Forelsket: (Norwegian) The euphoria you experience when you are first falling in love.

Gheegle: (Filipino) The urge to pinch or squeeze something that is unbearably cute.

Pochemuchka: (Russian) A person who asks a lot of questions.

Pena ajena: (Mexican Spanish) The embarrassment you feel watching someone else’s humiliation.

Cualacino: (Italian) The mark left on a table by a cold glass.

Ilunga: (Tshiluba, Congo) A person who is ready to forgive any abuse for the first time, to tolerate it a second time, but never a third time.

Pretending to be a Professional

 It's been 5 weeks since I've been interning in the technology department at a community college. My reflections: work = boring. The office environment is too constraining. It's dull. It's monotonous. When I grow up, I am never going to work at any place where I'm stuck in an office. The only reason I'm alive right now is because I work with awesome people. For example, I'm pretending to work right now. I'm usually on a computer, sending out e-mails, making phone calls, all of that jazz. But as you can see, I am actually blogging, while my coworker is playing Modern Warfare on the computer next to me. No, this is not an SOS. It's more of a life plan. I'm going to work for myself at home. I'm not going to have a boss. I am gonna stay in my pajamas all day and drink 18 cups of tea while I work. And since I have the attention span of about 7 minutes, I'll keep a trampoline next to me to satisfy my ADD. But these are merely hopes. Just wishful thinking. Let's see what actually ends up happening. Until I get out of this dreary internship and get my college degree, I have one rule to live by in the professional world: WWKWD - What Would Kanye West Do? That gives the answer to everything.

Life's a Booger

As a distracted driver, it is my obligation to think about everything but the road while I'm driving. On my way to work this morning, my mom kept yelling at me for going too fast and rarely ever using the brake. Once I made it onto the highway, I carelessly began passing by cars and pondering over stuff, which I gather to be a teenager's favorite word. I remembered when I first began driving and I took a delight in hating it. The reason that I despised it, and I still do, was because I sucked at it. I was afraid of crashing into a cow and flipping the whole car over, killing myself, the other passengers in the car, and the cow. Therefore, I avoided driving as much as possible. I was discouraged by the possibility of making mistakes. I didn't want to mess up. But that's what life's about. There's no possible way you can live life without making a fool out of yourself. Making mistakes is evitable. But that's how you learn. Sometimes it's the only way you learn. You shouldn't be scared of messing up, and you most definitely shouldn't let it keep you from doing something. It's taken me forever to embrace this concept.

What's even more amazing is that Allah 'azawajal realizes this as well. He understands that as human beings, we screw up. That's why He constantly reminds us that we need to turn back to Him and ask for forgiveness. He is always ready to answer our du'as. All we have to do is ask. It's like if you're picking your nose when you notice that somebody's watching you. You sheepishly apologize for being so embarrasingly disgusting and you never pick your nose in public again. So if you commit a sin and then remember that Allah's watching, you suddenly regret what you did and turn back to Him is repentance. Then you've learned your lesson. And even if you didn't, you can still turn back to Him if you mess up again. He is the Most Forgiving and Most Merciful. It's amazing how inspiring a simple car ride can be.

Back in Business

Have you ever had an extra sugar, extra cream mochafrappalatte thing, and as you're sipping the dreadfully scrumptious drink, you can just feel all of that caffeine and sugary goodness seeping through your bloodstream, waking up every inch of you as it slowly flows through your body until you reach a hyperactive stage that seems to resemble a rabid panda? I didn't think so. It's an amazing feeling. But personally, I like the non-caffeinated version of these power surges, like when you are reunited with old friends, go out with a new pair of shoes on, or get a bone-chilling EmanRush. They're the little things that rejuvenate you and bring out that delicious fuzzy feeling that was hiding deep inside your chicken soul. It's like true love. Everybody has something different that makes them so happy that it plasters a permanent goofy smile on their face. I'm going through this stage right now. I got in touch with some of my beloved friends, I've been inspired to go back to the artisitc ways, I now have 2 pet hamsters, and I'm attending an Arabic class in a few weeks. It's absolutely thrilling. I feel like a new person. I think I might be able to get some stuff done now. That's simply miraculous.