My Life in Numbers

I slept for fifteen hours (15 HOURS) and I just ate breakfast which consisted of something other than cereal but I'm not sure what it was because I burnt my tongue while drinking my third cup of coffee so I couldn't taste anything and I didn't bother looking down at my plate and it's a miracle that I'm even using semi-proper grammar right now and I've only been sitting on this chair for 5 minutes and my backside is already hurting and I think I'm starting to go a little cross eyed. It's spring break. I have a second chance to redeem my sanity. I have absolutely nothing planned for the next 10 days, and so I thought I'd start it off right by contemplating over my life. I've used my limited knowledge I have of the theory of quantum physics to mathematically divide all of the time within the last year of my existence into 17 distinct categories, along with the percentage of how much of the year was spent (wasted) in that category, which have been listed in descending order:

1. Time spent sleeping: 25% (131,400 minutes)

2. Time spent eating: 12.5% (65,700 minutes)

3. Time spent living moments of blatant awesomeness that cannot be put into words: 11.5% (60,225 minutes)

4. Time spent awake due to Internet access: 10.4% (54,750 minutes)

5. Time spent pretending to work on homework: 8.3% (43,800 minutes)

6. Time spent praying: 5.2% (27,375 minutes)

7. Time spent yelling at my sisters to stop singing: 4.2% (21,900 minutes)

8. Time spent living horrific tales of sheer embarrassment that cannot be put into words: 3.1% (16,425 minutes)

9. Time spent trying to figure out what a Sheikh said last so I can write it in my notes, but then missing what he says next, and therefore failing at note-taking all together: 2.7% (14,400 minutes)

10. Time spent awake due to Internet access: 10.4% (54,750 minutes)

11. Time spent actually working on homework: 1.7% (9,125 minutes)

12. Time spent laughing for no apparent reason: 1.4% (7,300 minutes)

13. Time spent watching BBC and PBS: 1.04% (5,475 minutes)

14. Time spent telling myself that I don't need sleep at 3 AM because I procrastinated on my homework: 0.07% (3,657 minutes)

15. Time spent listening to my Qur'an teacher tell me that I need to do قلقلة: n0.005% (2,555 minutes)

16. Time spent trying to peel an orange without getting the juice in my paper cut: 0.004% (1,825 minutes)

17. Time spent in making this list: 0.00014% (75 minutes)

18. *BONUS: Time spent trying to fish the croutons out of the soup I was eating while coming up with this list: 0.000029% (15 minutes)

I actually got out my calculator to multiply and divide into these percentages, so I think they're fairly accurate. In that case, this is quite frightening because I spend more time on the Internet than I do praying. I'm calling for an intervention.